If you hate Twitter look away now.
As Labour's swan song in Brighton draws to a close attention inevitably shifts toward the Tories. People have tentatively begun tweeting with a different combination of hash tags for Dave's rave in Manchester. Hash tags should be obvious and short - Conservative Party Conference?
UPDATE 23:45: Apologies for the continued techiness, however, after much discussion with the Tory twitterati a compromise of #cpc09 has been drawn. CPC was getting confused with the Conservative Party of Canada, apparently. TB didn't know what all the fuss was aboot.
Having been an absolute loser for the last hour he is now going to finish the video he has been trying to work on all day. All sorts of things have cropped up though.
Watch this space.
Wednesday, 30 September 2009
If you hate Twitter look away now.
This has to be TB's fav News in Briefs in a while:
"David Cameron is the man. Looking at his background, he needs to prove he's in touch with hard-working Britons. However this is his time. Everyone will expect him to make things better. He can't possibly do this instantly as he will inherit huge, long-term, deep rooted problems. WE need to allow him time to implement fresh ideas and polices that will get the country off its knees."
Tickets are selling nicely so take advantage of the £5 price tag while you can. You'll also have an opportunity to get your hands on one of these little fellas:
It seems that
Contrasting Labour's record on equalities and feminism with that of the Tories, she said that David Cameron would extend foxhunting rights to everyone, while George Osborne would replace a SureStart in every community with "a lapdancing club in every community".
I immediately thought this was odd. Why single out Osborne and lapdancing? There is no Shadow Treasury policy on the issue, as far as I am aware. Could this have been a sly reference to something about Osborne's private life? After all the News of the World had snaps of him in his youth next to a prostitute - snaps that were referred to in the "smeargate" affair.
Anyway, I've just been told by sources close to Harman that no smear was intended. It was simply meant to be a jokey reference to lapdancing club tickets distributed during last year's Tory conference in Birmingham.
The overbearing message from Labour Conference?
Go back to your constituencies and prepare for opposition.
Not bad for an operation that has only just set up!
Tuesday, 29 September 2009
The wunderkid Ed Miliband just got a vintage Paxman creaming
UPDATE 00.01: As
"This is like watching Bambi's mother be punched by John Leslie..."
Shares in Nokia will be through the roof tomorrow.
"Mr Blair’s absence from British politics since his departure from No 10 is understood to have been largely due to Mr Brown’s desire to have a “clear run” without interference. He is also thought to have been bruised both by the way that his 2005 election campaign was overshadowed by the Iraq war and the trauma of his final months in office, which were dominated by the cash-for-honours scandal.
Supporters believe that, after two years of Mr Brown, the public are ready to regard the former Prime Minister in a more sympathetic light. One party figure, in a reference to the last general election campaign, when Mr Blair bought his successor a treat, said: “Gordon owes him an ice cream.”
TB's heart bleeds. Never forget Mr Blair, your last months were tough because of the whole world of shit that your brought down upon yourself with you hunger for power and lust of the high life. You have not been forgiven, the British people will never forget the damage you did. They just never thought it could get any worse.
How wrong they were.
Ms Mortimer has been somewhat quiet in recent months but she's on cracking form with
Who is Sarah Brown, and what does she want?
So TB has fled the scene of Gordon's desperate attempt to sound exciting and new. Seems a lot of hacks have had the same idea and have packed out the London train. The speech started well enough, it was a powerful eulogy for New Labour, but very quickly Brown crumbled and slipped back into lies, washed out old ideas, stolen policy and weak attacks on the Conservatives.
It seems Brown has, in his delusional state of mind, dreamt up an image of a Conservative Party he would like to be fighting rather than the one he actually faces. By the end of it he was fluffing his soundbites (probably on account of only being given the speech to read through after draft after draft this morning.) The wording of the ending had the potential to be quiet rousing, but in reality its delivery fell flat.
The speech will no doubt be remembered for the only real new idea in it - Gulags for Slags. Social engineering in the extreme by locking up single mothers in to state funded borstals. A sad day for personal responsibility.
The AV+ stuff and House of Lords announcements are hardly new. It's fine for Gordon to go at the constitution with an word axe, knowing full well he will be out of power before he promised to implement them. As for the ID card "announcement"? Well Alan Johnson announced this months ago and it not a mention of the database, the truly terrifying prospect. Guess that's staying then.
That's the only real relieve about today, whatever Gordon said was meaningless, he could promise the earth, and almost did. None of this ideas will see the light of day though.
Bring on Manchester, bring on DC, let's show the Lib Dems and Labour how a conference is done properly.
So TB ended up staying over night in Brighton and it's another shockingly sunny day on the seafront. He isn't sure if there is an opposite to pathetic fallacy, but it would be highly fitting. He
Obviously there was guarded caution around the bear, however the only plotting that TB sniffed out was plans for the post election days. It seems the party has, surprisingly gracefully, accepted defeat. Who will take over the party in May is already dominating conversation. Mandy's speech yesterday was discussed but with very little enthusiasm. It may have put fire in some bellies but outside of the bubble would it really have made that much difference? It was a good speech, an excellent conference speech, but a game-changer? No.
There is no energy, no buzz here. TB went along to the
Monday, 28 September 2009
Though TB's favourite moment so far has to be hiding from Red Ken:
UPDATE 20.30: Listening to Miliband speak about foreign policy. Interesting, however he pitched the mood just right with his opening gambit - "sorry to anyone here who was under the impression they would be hearing from my brother."
Been a surreal but interesting afternoon. TB will report in depth upon his return but lets just say Labour are plotting.
But not in the way you might think.
TB thought his own suggestion of "John didn't quite get that he wasn't meant to make his own Downfall video" was pretty funny.
But then he would wouldn't he.
They are so wise:
Sunday, 27 September 2009
After some slight problems TB's PayPal is now up and running. Tickets £5 pre-booked or a tenner on the door. Email to reserve your song. Details of TB's other events and speaking calender will be published this week. There will also be a small number of blue bears on sale at conference. Get in touch with TB if you want to reserve one.
He has it on good, female, authority that they are adorable and a bargain at a fiver!
Gordon has hit back at Darling's claims that Labour has lost the will to live. However it seems that the Party's
Armed with a camera.
UPDATE: 22.24: This
...show some love."
The Feeling song they are playing is highly appropriate for the Brighton Centre this afternoon. Moments before their leader takes to the stage:
UPDATE 17.15: People are apparently just milling around talking amongst themselves or packing out Cruddas fringe events. Ed Balls, Tom Watson and Kerry McCarthy, as well as other Labour members of the Twitterati, can't be bothered to go to Gordon's speech. They are propping up the bar instead:
Of all the lazy Sundays to sleep until high noon and miss Marr and Boulton, today clearly wasn't the one. So Marr, of sycophantic 2007 cancelled election interview fame, actually plucked up the courage to give the sweating Prime Minister a platform to quell the speculation about his health and pill popping tendencies. Well Gordon technically denied it in words. He was referring to reguarly taking painkillers not anti-depressant though and looked extremely uncomfortable about the unexpected question.
It's not like he's never lied before is it.
The row over the so-called ‘Treasury mole’ flared again last night after one of Chancellor Alistair Darling’s staff resigned to take a job in the private office of Shadow Chancellor George Osborne.
Yesterday, the mandarin’s defection prompted a war of words between Labour and the Tories, amid suggestions that the official could have been linked to a series of damaging leaks about the Government’s economic plans.
The sense of intrigue surrounding the move then deepened after both sides refused to name the man.
Well TB has managed to get hold of some exclusive footage of the man:
Ok so maybe not.
Saturday, 26 September 2009
It seems the Go Fourth tweetup/shindig had some infiltrators tonight. These pictures of prominent tory activists via
TB was tempted to go along tonight but was taken down by some dodgy sushi. Better than being taken down by one of the Four Horseman of the Twapocalypse:
Two of them have history of thumping people after all.
Well there is another seat TB will dropping by to campaign in soon.