Sunday, 30 May 2010

A Law Unto Himself

It could just be wishful thinking after a delightful rosé fuelled afternoon rolling around in the garden, dressed up as a commando, with a six and four year old - but flicking through analysis and comment tonight, TB gets the feeling that things are aligned for a swift return for Mr Laws. Michael Moore shouldn't get too cosy in the Scotland Office.

The Prime Minister's reply to Law's resignation letter was unconventionally warm and the choice of Danny Alexander as a replacement for the Chief Secretary job is mind boggling. If the Parliamentary Standards Commissioner taps Laws on the knuckles, or clears him, could we see the former head of communications for the Cairngorms National Park, Danny Alexander, a man of no discernible talent or economic ability, return from whence he came and Mr Laws pick up his axe from where he left off? Fingers crossed.

There are four must read pieces that have emerged in the last 24 hours re David Laws:

Fraser Nelson
This whole story is a tragedy. No one, in any party, can doubt that an honourable and able man has gone. Those who had wanted fast fiscal consolidation have lost a trusted advocate. The government will be all the weaker for it.
James Forsyth
his boss:
The other person in the government who could do the job—Phillip Hammond—can’t because he is a Tory and the role is reserved for a Lib Dem. With the best will in the world, it is hard to imagine that Danny Alexander will be able to do the job with the ability that Laws was doing it.
Matthew Parris is
bang on the money
Of course Mr Laws made an error of judgment. Hundreds of MPs have cocked up badly as parliamentarians scramble to keep abreast of violent and bewildering changes in the national mood. The present Defence Secretary handed back £22,000 in March. Hundreds have made repayments.

Meanwhile, other MPs across the United Kingdom are living, with a declared partner, in accommodation wholly or partially funded by the taxpayer — entirely within the rules.
Even old lefty Sir Michael White is
So I regret his going and hope the Telegraph's more thoughtful readers are as unimpressed as I am. Perhaps the newspapers really are losing the plot in their – our – battle to retain sales share.

Bad Day for Country, Coalition and Telegraph

Last year The Telegraph undertook a fantastic public service in blowing the lid off the murky cover-up of MPs expenses. Without bias they gave all barrels to all guilty politicians of all colours. However it seems they haven't been quite as open and honest in their tactics as it first seemed. Why did they not unveil these details about David Laws when they were orgasmically pushing their "Expenses Files" a year ago? Could it have been that it wasn't quite deemed a big enough story? A minor infraction of the letter of the rules rather than some of the shameless abuse and flagrant fraud that went on elsewhere? Could it be that Mr Laws was clearly not gaining financially from the situation, in fact taking a cheaper option than renting his own flat? Or could it be that they are now willing to do someone's dirty work using their information to carry out political vendettas?

It now seems The Telegraph are happy to play politics with their small, but very powerful, memory stick. Since Laws became Chief Secretary hacks have seemed desperate to out him. TB hopes Holly Watt and Robert Winnett are feeling very smug and happy tonight. There is no doubt this story would have been tiny if the underlying aim hadn't been pointing a finger and screaming "SECRET GAYER!" If you have any doubt look at the headline of the original story. "Treasury chief David Laws, his secret lover and a £40,000 claim" - a sensationalist outburst worthy of the tabloids with a very carefully chosen order for the allegations. As for the £40k figure? TB can't get his head round that either - it was legal to pay rent to a dubiously named "partner" until 2006. So between 2001 and then Laws was claiming legally. So presumably the £40k figure mentioned included those legal payments. Though this is hardly surprising given the fact the story was a thinly disguised excuse at outing Laws.

It is no surprise that The Telegraph won the race to expose - they are now abusing their position as the leading light in the expenses fight. Without access to those files they wouldn't have the crucial name of the landlords, but it beggars belief that they found the link by themselves. Still the expenses scandal drags on, but now more viciously than the infringements deserve. The Telegraph need to release the rest of the expenses files so this scandal, thought dead, can be buried once and for all. The drip drip has to stop - it is fundamentally unfair- damn them all or damn none, don't play politics with timing and picking and choosing victims to fit agendas.

The economic security of the country has been undermined by The Telegraph's ego and flogging of a dead horse. The General Election was meant to clear the air, but it seems the Telegraph are still sitting on much much more than they let out originally. A line needs to be drawn under this scandal and if Laws's position was untenable, the many of the blue and red front-benches should also be hounded out of office too. But hold on, they weren't choosing to keep the fact that they were gay out of the soiled pages of the newspapers.

One thought that TB can't get out of his head is this whole affair reeks of a stitch up. Who tipped The Telegraph to the name of the landlord/boyfriend? Who might have know about the former Chief Secretary's expense arrangements? Former deputy leaders and presidents of parties are privy to that sort of information about their MPs. Who is on internal party manoeuvres? Who is in cahoots to see the left of Liberal Democrats have a stronger voice? Who are more opposed to the right-wing Laws than the likes of Vince Cable and Simon Hughes, both rocking the boats behind the scenes. Just sayin'.

As you might be able to tell TB is still seething about the fact Laws had to go though he sees why this honourable man felt he should go. Yes he was stupid, but on the scale of the expenses scandal this was not a resigning issue. His swift return is needed for the country and coalition, the figures being discussed for Laws pale in comparison to the figures he was slicing off the deficit. Osborne put it perfectly that he seemed to be put on the earth to undertake the drastic reforms and cuts needed to the state, Danny Alexander looks like a simpleton in comparison and there is no way the Emergency Budget is going to be as successful as it would have been under Laws's careful eye. Laws in the Treasury was by in far the best thing about this coalition and now that has been shattered.  In a desire for a quick scoop and cheap thrill The Telegraph have really blundered this time. Two people that are sadly missed - Will Lewis and David Laws.

Friday, 28 May 2010

♫ And you're working for no one but me... ♫


Thursday, 27 May 2010

Kiddy Polling

Keen bean

Keep Right Online
has prepared another poll for the Conservative Future election. TB hears that the ballot won't be for awhile, but the handover is ideally planned for conference.

There is some debate that the whole thing should be done online to save money on mailing out 20,000 ballot papers. TB is inclined to agree. Apparently this is "unconstitutional" though. Seeing as the constitution has been ignored for the last ten years why the sudden concern?

Either way,have your say on who you will back here:

The site will be polling for a week.

Quote of the Day - Tin Foil Hat Edition

"I'm also of sound mind; it's the situation that's crazy"

-The water tight defence of definitely-not-a-nutter Tim "
" Ireland who proves he isn't an obsessive by sending two thousand word long emails.


"I wonder if I could persuade David Laws to defect to the democrats"

Congratulations to
"Uncle Bob"
who wins the tickets to tonight's debate. Email TB Bob and he will sort you out with Intelligence2.

Wednesday, 26 May 2010

A Win Win Situation, Sort Of

Given Obama seems to have enough problems trying to fix a hole, who knows how he will react if North Korea shell Seoul. Tomorrow evening

in collaboration with BBC World News will be hosting a debate at the Methodist Hall. "Obama’s foreign policy is a gift to his enemies" could get pretty heated.

Speakers for the motion are:

General Jack Keane
Retired four-star general, former
Vice Chief of Staff of the US Army
and a key strategist in Iraq.

Bill Kristol
Conservative political commentator,
and founder and editor of The
Weekly Standard magazine.

Con Coughlin
Executive foreign editor of the
Telegraph and expert on the Middle
East and Islamic terrorism.

And against...

Simon Schama
Professor at Columbia University,
broadcaster, critic and contributing
editor at the Financial Times.

Bernard-Henri Lévy
France's leading philosopher and a
publisher, novelist, journalist and

Philip Bobbitt
Herbert Wechsler Professor of
Federal Jurisprudence at Columbia
Law School.

It will be chaired by Zeinab Badawi one of the  BBC World News presenters. Full details about the event can be found

TB has a couple of tickets worth £50 up for grabs for the wittiest person who tells us before tomorrow lunchtime what POTUS is thinking...

Tuesday, 25 May 2010

Stephen "Fairy" Pound

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Stephen Pound is a foul mouthed bruiser. You should have heard him at the otherwise serene
Parliamentary Pancake race
. So what a
"Labour MP Stephen Pound has been accused of calling Arsenal’s former England defender Sol Campbell a “fairy” during a recent Premier League football match.

The recently re-elected Labour politician is said to have made the homophobic remark when his football team, Fulham, failed to overcome rivals Arsenal during a game at the Emirates Stadium in North London, last weekend.

The 61-year-old was heard making a string of offensive remarks whilst ranting from his £35,000-a-year executive box."
Charming. Cue lefty outrage.. oh wait.. no, silence? Of course.

What You Pay For

Here's a corker from a

BBC hack
. Right now beeboids are having lessons on how to use... wait for it.. Twitter:
Maybe Osborne and Laws should be sent round to White City with their axe.

Monday, 24 May 2010

Nice Work...

If you can

get it:

IPSA - while meant to be cleaning up MPs expenses has had a PR disaster of a first week back at school. No wonder they need a spinner, but is paying them more than an MP really appropriate?


Look away now if you don't care, but if traffic levels are anything to go by on that poll last week the CF traffic on this site is more than ever. Over to
for some analysis.

So, the poll’s closed and the results are in.  Non-Conservative Party member Sara Scarlett (ineligible) has romped home to victory in our straw poll in association with  But what do the results really tell us?


Firstly, it appears some people on all sides had people attempting to rig the results in their favour.  It’s a good thing we weren’t born yesterday.  The candidates may or may not have known about these attempts but nonetheless the results you see in front of you reflect the polling after duplicates (triplicates, decuplicates etc) were factored out.

Secondly, the vote seems to tell us that the ‘Other’ category for write-in candidates will command a huge portion of the real results, which is thought to be put to vote in September.  Many people are undecided, while some write-in candidates include:
-  Andy Peterkin
-  Tory Bear 
-  Rowan Cole (?)

And a few people thought they were funny, with Margaret Thatcher, Obo the Clown, A Low-Fat Yoghurt and ‘Scrap CF’ being called to stand.  One that tickled this editor was ‘Tory Twat Bear’.  Some people are far too witty.

Thirdly, of those eligible to stand, it looks like Emma Carr has the momentum at this point.  The North-Eastern lass is well known for her effective and tireless activism.  Disappointments may be in store for some potential candidates who thought they would have been able to sweep the board on this one. Time will tell.

Thursday, 20 May 2010


TB will be on LBC for an hour at eight. You can listen

Utter Balls

TB was gearing up to rip chunks out of this vomit inducing piece on the

Guardian website
by Ellie Gellard:
I am well aware that Ed Balls is not the most popular candidate for Labour leader. Vilification by the rightwing press has led to an image of Balls which many who know him personally, many of whom I’ve spoken to, do not recognise. This will be an opportunity for the public to see the real Ed. Quite simply, it will be a cold day in hell when Labour party members choose our leader based on his popularity in the sections of the media we rightly loathe. Ed has the hunger, the drive and the fire in the belly to lead our party back into Downing Street. It is perhaps just that which the rightwing media fear.
However it seems
Toby Young
has beat him to it:
Allow me to correct this misapprehension. The truth is that most rightwing commentators would dearly love to see Ed Balls as the next Labour leader. Not only does he come across badly on television – a Stalinist thug trying, unsuccessfully, to seem human – but he’s fatally tainted by his close association with Gordon Brown. He would be a terrible electoral liability, worse even than the insufferably smug Diane Abbott. Next to him, Michael Foot seems positively Churchillian.

The problem is. he produces such an instant, visceral dislike that we find it impossible to stop ourselves pointing out how ghastly he is. We all recognise, I think, that we should either keep quiet or relentlessly attack his politics, allowing the Ellie Gerard’s of this world to portray him as the leadership candidate we fear the most. But we simply can’t repress our violent hatred of the man. To adapt a phrase of Edward Heath’s, he is the unacceptable face of socialism.
What he said.

Wednesday, 19 May 2010

Where's Yvette?


Iain Dale
 said... judge a man by the company he keeps. So it's no surprise then that Ed Balls has secured the backing of Kerry McCarthy. There are 13 Labour MPs now backing Balls.
Vernon Coaker (Gedling)
Sharon Hodgson (Washington & Sunderland West)
Kevin Brennan (Cardiff West)
Kerry McCarthy (Bristol East)
Iain Wright (Hartlepool)
Diana Johnson (Kingston upon Hull North)
David Wright (Telford)
Khalid Mahmood (Birmingham Perry Barr)
Andrew Gwynne (Denton & Reddish)
Helen Jones (Warrington North)
Eric Joyce (Falkirk)
Dave Anderson (Blaydon)
John Robertson (Glasgow North West)
Aren't we missing someone there? Is there a reason his MP wife isn't on the list?

On the day of his big launch, here is some information you might like to know about Ed Balls:

Just sayin'.

A Very Scarlett Coup

Though in no way is TB as accurate as someone like err Tweetminster of YouGov at predicting election outcomes, the straw poll released this morning about the old upcoming CF Chairman election has thrown up some interesting results:

The coalition is deep and strong! Sara Scarlett, a Liberal Democrat libertarian is way out in front despite never having actually defected. There was talk of it once but now the two parties are in coalition what's the point? Something tells TB the old guard in Conservative Future wouldn't put up with it in reality.

In all seriousness TB is up for one lass hurrah in terms of kid politics by covering this election along with Keep Right Online. The lovely Emma Carr seemingly has a strong chance if she were to run. It looks like it could be a big field and the showing in this early poll for "Other" is very high.

A Liberal Democrat take over of the youth wing of the Conservative Party?  What larks.

Quote of the Day

"Thousands of millions of working class people feel let down"

-Ed Balls


In coordination with

Keep Right Online
, TB is happy to help poll young Tories for their thoughts for the next Chairman of Conservative Future after Michael Rock has finally been convinced to stand down after 21 years. So yes, within three months there will be that glorious bunfight which is a Tory youth election. A wet dream for the Guardian and just what the Party wants right now...

TB writing about CF? Lordy, it's like the old days.

A Handy Guide to the Labour Candidates


Tuesday, 18 May 2010


Game Time for Bercow

Dear new Member,

Many congratulations and welcome to the House.

Please forgive me for this generic email being brief and to the point.

The first job of the House today is to appoint the Speaker. The Father of the House, Sir Peter Tapsell, will present a motion to the House that John Bercow remains as Speaker.

At this point, members will shout 'Aye', on this occasion there will also be members from all parties shouting 'No'. If enough members shout 'No', this will force a division and your first vote as new members will be to vote for or against appointing John Bercow as Speaker.

At this point, the green monitors will flash with the words 'Division' and the division bell will ring. This is a free vote and is entirely unwhipped and so whether to vote or not is wholly your decision. You will also have the option to abstain, and so you do not enter either of the voting lobbies.

Despite scare mongering by some left-wing commentators, there will be no repercussions according to which way you vote.

I am sure you are aware that during the previous Parliamentary term Mr Bercow was appointed as Speaker, with unanimous Labour and a handful of Conservative votes. In the words of a Labour whip, it was done to 'stick it to the Tories'.

That aside, there are a number of reasons why, since his appointment, Mr Bercow has proven unsuitable in the Speaker's role. Not least, on the occasions during the last session when Mr Bercow found remaining impartial, a crucial quality in the role of Speaker, very difficult, leading to a number of heated exchanges between the Speaker and Conservative MPs.

We are about to head into choppy political waters. It is imperative we have a Speaker who possesses dignity, gravitas, ability, wisdom and who can command respect from all sides of the House. A Speaker beyond reproach, who via his experience has earned the entitlement to such an important office.

There are a number of candidates from all sides imminently more suitable, able and willing; Edward Leigh, Sir Menzies Campbell, Alan Hazlehurst, and Margaret Beckett.

It is imperative that we are seen to begin this Parliament renewed and afresh. We can only do that with a democratic vote for the Speaker. If Mr Bercow wins the vote, he will have the endorsement of the whole House and not just the Labour party.

The Labour MP Kate Hoey, who is supporting the vote and I will be acting as tellers. If you come to the division lobby there will be members on the doors directing you to the lobby depending on which way you wish to vote. I am sure you understand the importance of this vote. I look forward to counting you out of the lobby during your first division.
With very best wishes,


Nadine Dorries.

Will it be enough? Fingers crossed...


Monday, 17 May 2010

What Next for Scotland?

The Scottish Tory party is a mess. Please feel free to send TB thoughts on what next, what beyond a much needed change of leader, can be done. A Caledonian conspirator writes:

As you will probably know (or are at least aware of the arguments for), Scotland has historically and traditionally been a conservative country. My countrymen’s recent dogged and, frankly, frustrating attempts to blame Thatcher for the countries woes are now unfounded. Our inability to take responsibility for ourselves, and corresponding blind loyalty to Labour, has done us more damage in the last couple of decades than Lady T ever did.

The meaning of “the union” has always been influx. The Scots and English have always had a different law, education and health systems and both countries have maintained their own separate cultures – hence the reason that a union was required (otherwise it’d just be one country). But then you know all this…

How do we wrestle Scotland back from the grip of a destructive, corrupt and entrenched Labour party who do nothing but take their vote in Scotland for granted?

I would suggest that the Tories need to acknowledge the new constitutional reality in the UK and revise their interpretation of ‘the union’. (One of the features, for me at least, of the recent leaders debates was that the BBC clearly had not. I’m not suggesting the SNP should have got an equal footing, the constitutional anomalies would have been as good as impossible to address, but there was little recognition of this when the debates were being agreed between the broadcasters (I could be wrong here)).

So, basically, I think the Scottish Tories should publically acknowledge what many of them do in private. The Scots should be granted full political and fiscal autonomy. This is completely consistent with conservatism (de-centralisation / individual responsibility / etc) and would create competition between the two countries (which, again, a key feature of conservatism). This would probably need a complete separation between the Scots Tories and the Westminster based party to assure the Scots that connections to the ‘nasty party’ have been severed but an ideological partnership could be retained.

We could then redefine the union as a cultural and social one. Free labour movement, both countries could leave the EU (they would have to – and I’d argue for Scotland to stay out and join EFTA), etc, etc…

As you rightly claim, an effective right of centre party is completely absent from Scotland. This is not only damaging (in terms of political arguments in Scotland being almost arbitrary) but it is inconsistent with the political make up of the Scots psyche.

Sure, there’d be problems and tension but to pretend that the current arrangement is doing anything other than sour the relations between the two countries is deluded.

Unionism is British nationalism. We should all have the courage to be nationalistic about our individual countries, rather than some strange ‘union’ that exists between them. Nationalism is a good thing as long as it does not lead one to think their nation is superior to other nations.

Consistent with this, I believe, my nationalism is all about individual responsibility and recognising Scotland’s failings as much as it is about promoting its strength. When I argue for an independent Scotland I do very much from a pro-England, and pro-English, perspective. Two great countries which are locked in a tense and unconstructive relationship.

When Hamilton and Button came first and second driving for McLaren in a recent Grand Prix it was billed as a British victory. Nonsense, it was an English one, and I was delighted for them. If I was English I would have wanted this to have been described as an English victory. I certainly didn’t feel the Scots should have been recognised, even implicitly.
TB's unionist credentials have softened since he moved to London. Regarding the ideas pitched here? Full fiscal yes but keeping the head of state, defence and FCO control and he might just be on to something... 

Best Campaign Ad Ever



He'd get TB's vote.

Saturday, 15 May 2010

A Tale of Two Launches

When David Miliband declared his candidacy for leader last week, his straight out of the block approach lead to a rushed launch with a group of exhausted, miserable, barely know Labour MPs. All as old or older than him. Having just fought and lost the election campaign, David Miliband looked like one of the guilty men, awkwardly trying to congratulate Cameron before being able to turn the conversation to his announcement.

Compare and contrast his younger, less dorky brother Ed's launch at the eugenics loving Fabian Society's conference this morning. Note-less and comfortable in front of a audience, his bid was greeted with sustained applause. Has someone being having a little media training?

It was hardly a tough crowd for Miliband the Younger to launch his pitch to the semi-respectful, squeezable, soft left block of his party. It was more David Cameron to David Miliband's Davis. There he was jacket off, "descamisado" style, setting up his stall to the metropolitan Labour chatterers, reminding them the need to break out and fight in the rest of the country.

Just the two images show who has the better team in place, the better campaign up and running. David might have the support of a fair chunk of Labour's heavily deflated parliamentary party on side, but lest we forget the members and the unions have just as much say in this fight. Through AV David must win outright in the first round to avoid floods of second preferences for Ed pipping him to the post.And just because an MP has publicly declared doesn't mean they won't change their mind. This is going to be a very long summer for Labour.

 It's important to remember these brothers haven't been exactly been allies for years. David was tightly embeded with the Blairites and Ed very much Brown's man through the last thirteen years of infighting and potshots. There will be no love lost here - when David Miliband was out there making noises before chickening out, his little brother was on TV defending Gordon against him.

No wonder Ed was so willing to drive a wedge through his entire family, to rebel against the natural order that was previously carefully adhered to. He's on to a winner here.. It can only be a matter of time before this is turned into a TV drama.

Prescott's Burnham Booboo

Wonder which candidate Prescott has in mind the help?

Though would any candidate want the full weight of GO4TH - the unsuccessful Prescott fronted operation to lead Labour into fourth place, backing them?

Friday, 14 May 2010

The Future of Blogging

A you may have noticed TB finds himself

more and more as his day job takes over too much of his writing time. As the dust settles and routine gets back to normal, he will try get at least a few posts a day up. He will try get his full analysis of the last couple of months up this weekend. As if by coincidence TB's views on that power of blogging under the coalition, or lack of it, have been profiled by the BBC:
"What did surprise me is how quickly the prominent bloggers fell behind the Lib-Con coalition idea, you wouldn't expect that to happen so quickly, even though it is what was needed. We wouldn't want any unnecessary internal argument, it took us 15 years to regroup and be together.

I think after this election you will see how they will all push their own agendas about policies. Blogs have more power now, and any MP would be foolish not to take them seriously. They can bring you down."
You can read the whole article

Wednesday, 12 May 2010

Still Waiting...

So he finally made it. Waited a long time to see this:

Still waiting for the call from Dave to ask TB to be his Twitter Tsar...

Tuesday, 11 May 2010

Ding Dong

No time to blog. Follow TB on Twitter.

Brown's Legacy

TB is snowed under in all sort of post election excitement and the blog is clearly suffering. So the miserable old sod is off, but what will his

Who was it that said the BBC was biased?

Saturday, 8 May 2010


has the list of seats that UKIP votes denied a Tory win:
Bolton West: Labour 18,329; Conservative 18,235; UKIP 1,901
Derby North: Labour 14,896; Conservative 14,283; UKIP 829
Derbyshire NE: Labour 17,948: Conservative 15,503; UKIP 2,636
Dorset mid & Poole: Labour 21,100; Conservative 20,831; UKIP 2,109
Dudley North: Labour 14,923; Conservative 14,274; UKIP 3,267
Great Grimsby: Labour 10,777: Conservative 10,063: UKIP 2,043
Hampstead & Kilburn: Labour 17,332; Conservative 17,290; UKIP 408
Middlesbrough South: Labour 18,138; Conservative 16,461; UKIP 1,881
Morley (Ed Balls): Labour 18,365; Conservatives 17,264; UKIP 1,506
Newcastle-Under-Lyme: Labour 16,393; Conservatives 14,841; UKIP 3,491
Plymouth Moor View: Labour 15,433; Conservatives 13,845; UKIP 3,188
Solihull: Liberal 23,635; Conservatives 23,460; UKIP 1,200
Somerton & Frome: Liberal 28,793; Conservatives 26,976; UKIP 1,932
Southampton Itchen: Labour 16,326; Conservatives 16,134; UKIP 1,928
St Austell & Newquay: Liberal 20,189; Conservatives 18,877; UKIP 1,757
St Ives: Liberal 19,619; Conservatives 17,900; UKIP 2,560
Telford: Labour 15,977; Conservatives 14,996; UKIP 2,428
Walsall North: Labour 13,385; Conservatives 12,395; UKIP 1,737
Walsall South: Labour 16,211; Conservatives 14,456; UKIP 3,449
Wells: Liberal 24,560; Conservatives 23,760; UKIP 1,711
Wirral South: Labour 16,276; Conservatives 15,745; UKIP 1,274
's in the Tory party - Conservative in the head, UKIP at heart - must find this wounding despite their obvious sympathy. The Balls result is particularly stinging.

TB Does a DC

Just managed to catch up with the last

Guy News
of the election campaign which you made of missed in the flurry of yesterday. Ladies and Gentlemen...The election coverage credits:

TB was sure he'd destroyed that last clip!

Friday, 7 May 2010

Meanwhile in 1992...


this suddenly has a new resonence:

As does Hannan's poetic slamming last time the Tories bashed Labour at the polls:

The time has come, the time is now
just go go go I don't care how
you can go by foot, you can go by cow
Gordon Brown will you please go now

You can go on skates, you can go on Skis
You can go in a hat but please go please
I don't care, you can go by bike
you can go on a zike bike if you like

If you like you can go in an old blue shoe
Just go go go, please do do do
Gordon Brown I don't care how
Gordon Brown will you please go now

Things Can Only Get Better

As TB drove down the Mall today in a cab, it wasn't exactly the dawn of the new age he quite wanted, but a new dawn none the less. Last night was a strange one, so many gains but some really painful loses. It's a real shame that the incoming government won't be served by Mark Clarke in Tooting, Shaun Bailey in Hammersmith, and Peter Lyburn in Perth and North Perthshire, TB is sure we have not heard the last of these guys. Those seats have been pounded hard for years by these excellent candidates and it was painful that they just missed out. Though it has to be said, there is no love lost that the demons finally got Phillipa Stroud. Overall, with one hundred gains it was a almost complete victory for Cameron. Funny that the left weren't spinning that 36% of the vote wasn't enough when Blair failed to even get that. 

So where do we go from here? Well it is right that the electoral system needs reforming. The only person to have a worse night than Gordon Brown was Nick Clegg. For all the hype, he managed to take his party backwards. Yet, he is on the brink of bring his party their first taste of power nearly a century. The Liberal Democrat activists would be churlish and plain stupid to reject this extremely generous offer to a minor party and the idea that some of them are still pushing that they could get into bed with Labour looks more and more like a joke every second. For Clegg to get the Home Office on his poor result last night would be a stunning achievement for him. Sorry Vince but it ain't gonna happen.

And so if it has to be coalition then so be it, but first on the agenda must be electoral reform - resizing of all constituencies - for fairness and a downsizing of Parliament - for fairness.  Civil liberties, education reform, tax cuts. Does it sound so dreadful!?

Clegg and Cameron finally ganged up to put the final nail into Gordon's coffin and with Cameron confirming that even if the yellow/blue talks he will be attempt a minority government. Gordon can cling on to the end of the weekend but what ever happened to a little dignity in his great office. He should just get in the car, get out the way and let what is going to happen on Monday happen today for the sake of the UK's financial security.

No doubt the post mortems will continue and TB has a lot to say on last night and will over the weekend and after a decent sleep. This could get very messy, but TB
concurs with Guido
. This is a rare change to destroy the Labour Party not only at the ballot box like last night, but forever. Let's get on it with it.

P.S. Just remembered like one of those awful drunken cold sweat flashbacks - damn we were close to getting Balls.Calvert 2010 might just have to wait until October.