This little piggy stayed at home...

The Jacqui Smith saga is far from over... This morning the excellent

news has broken

that the Home Secretary has faced further questioning and potentially an investigation after all. 

Captions contest anyone? 

Answers below...

Rearranging the deckchairs on the Titanic...

Spin spin away Peter.

Exclusive: Lib Dems hoping for a miracle...

Tory Bear has his eyes and ears everywhere, and none more so than at the Liberal Youth

conference

last weekend at Warwick University. Take a look at Lembit Opik's strategy for the Lib Dems retaining the number of seats they have in parliament at the next election:

Poor Lembit, he's been through a lot recently and it looks like

too many nights

on the lash are beginning to have an effect on him. 

Unless of course that actually is the official Lib Dem policy.

Tears of laughter...

TB had to watch this three times before he could even contemplate posting it...



"Don't worry Kate, this wont be on GMTV"

Hat-Tip -

Donal Blaney

Better dead than red.

Never one to lose his temper lightly TB has come to the conclusion that Tom Miller is a bit of a twat. When he's not

cosying up

with the bigger boys at LabourList, (he's almost a mini-Draper without the famous wife,) he pours drivel and preaches socialist state loving hate on his "Newer Labour"

blog.

This morning the world was greeted with the

sad news

that, in a referendum as straight as a nine bob note, Hugo Chavez is set to remain in power for the foreseeable future having poured millions of pounds into a state sponsored campaign to change the constitution.

As

other blogs

have picked up, this isn't good news for the people of Venezuela. Yet the little twerp Miller can

barely contain his joy

, or his communist sympathies.

If you like it so much Tom, why don't you put that silly hat of yours on and go live there.

Liberal Yoof are at each others throats.

It's never a good sign when even the former returning officer of an election starts bitching about what bitches the candidates all were. Well that's the Lib Dems for you. It seems that the newly created

Liberal Youth

are being dogged by petite politics and back stabbing...

"For me, the most disappointing aspect is the lack of unity. It has been put to me that an organisation that is doing little is most vulnerable to infighting, and I have to say that it has been a recurring theme of my time as Liberal Youth Returning Officer that most of the conversations I have been part of revolve around who isn't getting on with whom. How does such distraction help in the building of a better organisation?"

Read the rest of the damning statement from Liberal Bureaucracy

here

.

So as the dust settles on their spring conference that was held this weekend at Warwick University, (check out the organised fun in the agenda

here

,) it seems that already this little project is beginning to fall apart. Activists are bitching, no work is getting done and not a by-election for love nor money.

Tory Bear suggests the cause of all your problems may lie with this

chap

.

Labour say jump, Student press says how high?

Now despite some vocal people having no interest in student politics, a big chunk of the readership of this blog do care, so Tory Bear was quite excited about the idea of writing a weekly column for the duration of election season for the student press. However when the word got out - shock horror oh my god a tory being allowed somewhere to express his views arrrrgh, the editorial decision was taken to replace TB with a staff writer. As he gets on very well with some of the

Student

hacks TB doesn't want to point fingers, and understands that perhaps the decision was out of the hands of those who had previously encouraged it, but he does however know who it was that made the big fuss about it, claiming that TB wouldn't be neutral. Well luckily the ever growing

HackWatch

website has no qualms with printing the rejected first column and as you can see it's all very fair:

"The next few weeks will be a flurry of plotting late into the night, knocking on thousands of doors, leafleting and putting up posters, injected with the occasional hour of sleep. At the end of the day EUSA elections are not won with fancy videos or flashy websites, they are lost and won on the doorstep. It’s all about who can meet and talk to the most students to get their message out there...

...years of dreaming for some, months of planning for others, and what seemed like a good idea in the pub for one or two candidates is set to come down to a pitched battle on campus."

Oh well, their loss. Read the rest

here

.

If you thought the British blog wars were bad...

While Derek Draper continues to

embarrass himself

on a daily basis with his constant obssesion with triggering some sort of blog war with Guido and Iain etc, spare a thought for Xu Lai the Chinese blogger behind the risque

Pro-State in Flames

blog. He was

stabbed

this weekend after doing a bookshop interview with readers of his blog. Apparently someone didn't like something he posted...

He was taken into the loos of the bookshop by two armed men

and told

“You brought this on yourself. You know why we’re doing this, don’t you?”

Don't get any ideas Derek.

Rules of Political Life #56 - Dodgy kodak moments can easily go wrong...

If they are running in an election, however important, candidates love to show themselves recycling all manner of things. Though is it really a good idea to

be photographed

for your campaign throwing away the election guide put together to explain the rules and regulations of the election?

Given the quagmire of appeals and rule breaking that normally goes with student politics, Tory Bear doubts that the excuse of "Oh I didn't realise I was breaking the rules" will wash if this candidate gets busted...

Whoops.

The real life West Wing...

TB has a Monday morning treat for West Wing fans, who will love this

fascinating insight

into how Obama is running his ship. It gives a detailed account of who the main players in the administration are, and more importantly, where their desks are in relation to the Oval Office. 

The similarities between Obama and Santos, Rahm and Josh etc are uncanny...

Is it time for a Season 8?

So farewell then Gossip Girl...

Over the last few months various universities across the country have seen blogs emerge that are inspired by the hit US tv show "Gossip Girl". Brilliantly scathing and sarcastic, these blogs give an insiders look on the lives of trust fund kiddies while at university. 

GG Edinburgh Edition sadly had the MSM go to town on her this weekend, and although this

piece

in Scotland on Sunday was arguably pretty damn funny, apparently the Daily Mail were up for stirring things up.

The piece describes the "tell-all website has proved so popular it has had 12,000 hits in its first three months, and now receives more than 600 new visitors every week.

According to the blog, Edinburgh students' lifestyles include:

• Renting Georgian property in the city's New Town, where a flat in Dublin Street costs around £4,500 per person, the equivalent of a year's allowance of a student loan;

• Mid-term skiing holidays in the exclusive Swiss resort of Verbier, which costs around £3,000 for a week;

• Parties at the Royal Scots Club, renting out the place for a champagne reception and venison dinner for 120 people;

• All-day brunches fuelled by dozens of bottles of Moët & Chandon champagne at £30 each;

• Three nights a week partying in nightspots such as the Opal Lounge, where customers must spend at least £135 to reserve a table with a bottle of Mercier champagne."

Some lazy hack has clearly had their day made when they stumbled across the website but TB is never a fan of seeing a fellow blogger

go under

. He understands though that the negative PR this sort of thing causes can be rather unpleasant. 

So farewell then Gossip Girl, whoever you were.

Gordon says more tax...

Tory Bear rotates the t-shirts he sells every so often. This is your last chance to get your hands on one of the very popular, £10 bargain price Gordon specials:

See other designs and order

here

.

Boris banter.

Seems the party are really taking the new Conservative Future website seriously. Today they caught up with Boris for a little Q and A. As you can see he was on typical form:

Who is your political hero?

Aristotle, Pericles & the Mayor in Jaws

Why should people get involved with organisations like Conservative Future?

Because quite simply it’s the hottest ticket in town, and a great first dip of the toe in the warm waters of politics.

Read the rest

here

.

Exclusive: Hippies set to quit.

Word is reaching Tory Bear this afternoon that the

students occupying

a lecture theatre on Edinburgh University's campus will end their protest within the next 24 hours. The University of Edinburgh has caved into some of their demands such as organising a series of lectures on the middle east, banning Israeli products such as Eden Springs - (the water is actually bottled in Scotland ffs.) They did however laugh the hippies out of the room when they demanded that the university bankrupt itself by stopping the fantastic military research it does and sever its' ties with BAE. 

TB has on multiple occasions attempted to question the occupation's press team and they have failed to respond to his approaches. In doing so they have refused to deny witnesses concern that there was drug taking going on during the sit in. The University gave their tacit consent to the protest in agreeing to keep the wifi, power and heating on in the lecture theatre on throughout the occupation, much to the outrage of TB and

many of his fellow students

. The protest has caused havoc and upset many students and TB is welcoming the fact it is now about to collapse. They will attempt to spin it as some sort of victory but life will continue as normal on campus. 

Back to the status quo. Back to the real world and back to work for these skiving students.

UPDATE 19:16 - Nearly two hours after Tory Bear broke the story, it's now

official.

 

No!

Communist dictator Hugo Chavez is attempting to install himself as dictator for life in today's referendum into whether he can amend the Venezuelan constitution. The state funded yes campaign is dominating and a silencing opposition. They are busing in thousands of protesters and control state television. 

Chavez has lost this referendum once and is taking every measure to ensure he gets his yes this time round. In an interesting glimpse into what Britain would be like if the Labour Party are allowed to govern for ten more years - voters turning up to the polling station are biometrically tested before they can vote. 

Polling is showing the No campaign is only just behind though... We can but hope.

Ken Livingstone was unavailable for comment.

Idle speculation...

The case of little Alfie

the thirteen year old father shocked TB when he first he and about it. He was even more shocked when he saw a picture of the happy couple. To be honest little Alfie doesn't really look like he has it in him to be the father, he does after all look like a seven year old. The Sun would have paid this "couple" a hefty bit of cash for the exclusive access rights and pictures. The story has played throughout the weekend on TV, frontpages and caused a mild political storm. Something about the whole thing, apart from being a genuinely sad story, smelt fishy to TB. 

Is someone pulling the strings behind the scene? When fifteen year old Chantelle, herself a child, got pregnant, did someone spot an opportunity to make some cash? It now seems Chantelle has been a bit naughty according to

The News of the World

. Today two other lads have come forward saying they were having their wicked way with Chantelle at the same time as wee Alfie. 

Sadly in the current state of Brown's broken Britain, two fifteen year olds having a kid, while no less an awful case, wouldn't have got the attention the thirteen year old boy did. It was Alfie's dad who went to the papers. This is of course idle speculation but TB won't be surprised if

the DNA test comes back

showing Alfie is being used as a pawn in something much darker... and of course Max Clifford is involved.

How much money did Chantelle and Alfie's parents get for the exclusive and intense access from The Sun?

There are few things more irritating than a bad batch of Sunday newspapers... Luckily this week was quite the opposite. 

Here are TB's must reads:

The Sunday Times leader welcomes you to Broken Britain

.

James Dellingpole in the Telegraph has a message to the people of America

.

Liz Jones in the Mail has some empathy for Boris

. 

The Sunday Herald get the scoop on more Labour corruption 

... 

and the Mail has more.

Another week and another two barrels from Matthew d'Ancona in the Telegraph.

Was the 2005 election worth losing?

TB just spotted this very

interesting piece

from the Telegraph. TB isn't sure he agrees with exactly how Iain Martin imagines things playing out but fascinating none the less... 

"In the flat of No 10 in early 2009, the Prime Minister poured himself a drink and lay down on the sofa: what a horrific week. Could the economic data be any worse? Which bank would collapse next? What, thought Michael Howard, had he done to deserve this?

It had shocked pundits when the results came in on election night 2005. Yet, the only man not surprised that Tony Blair had been defeated was Howard, confident leader of the Conservative Party."

Things could have been very different.

Freak out your ex. Join the Conservatives.

The Canadian equivalent of our own Conservative youth movement is running an

excellent slogan campaign

at the moment:

TB wonders if it would work here...

Exclusive: Another Election Sucess!

A double whammy against Labour tonight as the excellent news is just breaking that Conservative Future queenbee Clare Hilley has been returned as a Councillor in

Waddon

by-election

tonight.

May Tory Bear be the first of many to say congratulations!

+++developing+++

UPDATE 23:45: Beat Labour by 240 votes... Proof that door knocking by CFers works. Go this weekend.

UPDATE: Friday 11am: