Stephen "Fairy" Pound

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Stephen Pound is a foul mouthed bruiser. You should have heard him at the otherwise serene

Parliamentary Pancake race

. So what a

surprise

:

"Labour MP Stephen Pound has been accused of calling Arsenal’s former England defender Sol Campbell a “fairy” during a recent Premier League football match.

The recently re-elected Labour politician is said to have made the homophobic remark when his football team, Fulham, failed to overcome rivals Arsenal during a game at the Emirates Stadium in North London, last weekend.

The 61-year-old was heard making a string of offensive remarks whilst ranting from his £35,000-a-year executive box."

Charming. Cue lefty outrage.. oh wait.. no, silence? Of course.

What You Pay For

Here's a corker from a

BBC hack

. Right now beeboids are having lessons on how to use... wait for it.. Twitter:

Maybe Osborne and Laws should be sent round to White City with their axe.

Nice Work...

If you can

get it:

IPSA - while meant to be cleaning up MPs expenses has had a PR disaster of a first week back at school. No wonder they need a spinner, but is paying them more than an MP really appropriate?

Polls'n'Stuff

Look away now if you don't care, but if traffic levels are anything to go by on that poll last week the CF traffic on this site is more than ever. Over to

KRO

for some analysis.

So, the poll’s closed and the results are in.  Non-Conservative Party member Sara Scarlett (ineligible) has romped home to victory in our straw poll in association with ToryBear.com.  But what do the results really tell us?

Firstly, it appears some people on all sides had people attempting to rig the results in their favour.  It’s a good thing we weren’t born yesterday.  The candidates may or may not have known about these attempts but nonetheless the results you see in front of you reflect the polling after duplicates (triplicates, decuplicates etc) were factored out.

Secondly, the vote seems to tell us that the ‘Other’ category for write-in candidates will command a huge portion of the real results, which is thought to be put to vote in September.  Many people are undecided, while some write-in candidates include:

-  Andy Peterkin

-  Tory Bear 

-  Rowan Cole (?)

And a few people thought they were funny, with Margaret Thatcher, Obo the Clown, A Low-Fat Yoghurt and ‘Scrap CF’ being called to stand.  One that tickled this editor was ‘Tory Twat Bear’.  Some people are far too witty.

Thirdly, of those eligible to stand, it looks like Emma Carr has the momentum at this point.  The North-Eastern lass is well known for her effective and tireless activism.  Disappointments may be in store for some potential candidates who thought they would have been able to sweep the board on this one. Time will tell.

T'wireless

TB will be on LBC for an hour at eight. You can listen

here

.

Utter Balls

TB was gearing up to rip chunks out of this vomit inducing piece on the

Guardian website

by Ellie Gellard:

I am well aware that Ed Balls is not the most popular candidate for Labour leader. Vilification by the rightwing press has led to an image of Balls which many who know him personally, many of whom I’ve spoken to, do not recognise. This will be an opportunity for the public to see the real Ed. Quite simply, it will be a cold day in hell when Labour party members choose our leader based on his popularity in the sections of the media we rightly loathe. Ed has the hunger, the drive and the fire in the belly to lead our party back into Downing Street. It is perhaps just that which the rightwing media fear.

However it seems

Toby Young

has beat him to it:

Allow me to correct this misapprehension. The truth is that most rightwing commentators would dearly love to see Ed Balls as the next Labour leader. Not only does he come across badly on television – a Stalinist thug trying, unsuccessfully, to seem human – but he’s fatally tainted by his close association with Gordon Brown. He would be a terrible electoral liability, worse even than the insufferably smug Diane Abbott. Next to him, Michael Foot seems positively Churchillian.

The problem is. he produces such an instant, visceral dislike that we find it impossible to stop ourselves pointing out how ghastly he is. We all recognise, I think, that we should either keep quiet or relentlessly attack his politics, allowing the Ellie Gerard’s of this world to portray him as the leadership candidate we fear the most. But we simply can’t repress our violent hatred of the man. To adapt a phrase of Edward Heath’s, he is the unacceptable face of socialism.

What he said.

Where's Yvette?

As 

Iain Dale

 said... judge a man by the company he keeps. So it's no surprise then that Ed Balls has secured the backing of Kerry McCarthy. There are 13 Labour MPs now backing Balls.

Vernon Coaker (Gedling)
Sharon Hodgson (Washington & Sunderland West)
Kevin Brennan (Cardiff West)
Kerry McCarthy (Bristol East)
Iain Wright (Hartlepool)
Diana Johnson (Kingston upon Hull North)
David Wright (Telford)
Khalid Mahmood (Birmingham Perry Barr)
Andrew Gwynne (Denton & Reddish)
Helen Jones (Warrington North)
Eric Joyce (Falkirk)
Dave Anderson (Blaydon)
John Robertson (Glasgow North West)

Aren't we missing someone there? Is there a reason his MP wife isn't on the list?


On the day of his big launch, here is some information you might like to know about Ed Balls:



Just sayin'.

A Very Scarlett Coup

Though in no way is TB as accurate as someone like err Tweetminster of YouGov at predicting election outcomes, the straw poll released this morning about the old upcoming CF Chairman election has thrown up some interesting results:

The coalition is deep and strong! Sara Scarlett, a Liberal Democrat libertarian is way out in front despite never having actually defected. There was talk of it once but now the two parties are in coalition what's the point? Something tells TB the old guard in Conservative Future wouldn't put up with it in reality.

In all seriousness TB is up for one lass hurrah in terms of kid politics by covering this election along with Keep Right Online. The lovely Emma Carr seemingly has a strong chance if she were to run. It looks like it could be a big field and the showing in this early poll for "Other" is very high.

A Liberal Democrat take over of the youth wing of the Conservative Party?  What larks.

Quote of the Day

"Thousands of millions of working class people feel let down"

-Ed Balls

Polling

In coordination with

Keep Right Online

, TB is happy to help poll young Tories for their thoughts for the next Chairman of Conservative Future after Michael Rock has finally been convinced to stand down after 21 years. So yes, within three months there will be that glorious bunfight which is a Tory youth election. A wet dream for the Guardian and just what the Party wants right now...



TB writing about CF? Lordy, it's like the old days.

A Handy Guide to the Labour Candidates

Via

Twitter

!

Wonk?

Game Time for Bercow

Dear new Member,

Many congratulations and welcome to the House.

Please forgive me for this generic email being brief and to the point.

The first job of the House today is to appoint the Speaker. The Father of the House, Sir Peter Tapsell, will present a motion to the House that John Bercow remains as Speaker.

At this point, members will shout 'Aye', on this occasion there will also be members from all parties shouting 'No'. If enough members shout 'No', this will force a division and your first vote as new members will be to vote for or against appointing John Bercow as Speaker.

At this point, the green monitors will flash with the words 'Division' and the division bell will ring. This is a free vote and is entirely unwhipped and so whether to vote or not is wholly your decision. You will also have the option to abstain, and so you do not enter either of the voting lobbies.

Despite scare mongering by some left-wing commentators, there will be no repercussions according to which way you vote.

I am sure you are aware that during the previous Parliamentary term Mr Bercow was appointed as Speaker, with unanimous Labour and a handful of Conservative votes. In the words of a Labour whip, it was done to 'stick it to the Tories'.

That aside, there are a number of reasons why, since his appointment, Mr Bercow has proven unsuitable in the Speaker's role. Not least, on the occasions during the last session when Mr Bercow found remaining impartial, a crucial quality in the role of Speaker, very difficult, leading to a number of heated exchanges between the Speaker and Conservative MPs.

We are about to head into choppy political waters. It is imperative we have a Speaker who possesses dignity, gravitas, ability, wisdom and who can command respect from all sides of the House. A Speaker beyond reproach, who via his experience has earned the entitlement to such an important office.

There are a number of candidates from all sides imminently more suitable, able and willing; Edward Leigh, Sir Menzies Campbell, Alan Hazlehurst, and Margaret Beckett.

It is imperative that we are seen to begin this Parliament renewed and afresh. We can only do that with a democratic vote for the Speaker. If Mr Bercow wins the vote, he will have the endorsement of the whole House and not just the Labour party.

The Labour MP Kate Hoey, who is supporting the vote and I will be acting as tellers. If you come to the division lobby there will be members on the doors directing you to the lobby depending on which way you wish to vote. I am sure you understand the importance of this vote. I look forward to counting you out of the lobby during your first division.
With very best wishes,

Yours,

Nadine Dorries.

Will it be enough? Fingers crossed...

Sound

What Next for Scotland?

The Scottish Tory party is a mess. Please feel free to send TB thoughts on what next, what beyond a much needed change of leader, can be done. A Caledonian conspirator writes:

As you will probably know (or are at least aware of the arguments for), Scotland has historically and traditionally been a conservative country. My countrymen’s recent dogged and, frankly, frustrating attempts to blame Thatcher for the countries woes are now unfounded. Our inability to take responsibility for ourselves, and corresponding blind loyalty to Labour, has done us more damage in the last couple of decades than Lady T ever did.

The meaning of “the union” has always been influx. The Scots and English have always had a different law, education and health systems and both countries have maintained their own separate cultures – hence the reason that a union was required (otherwise it’d just be one country). But then you know all this…

How do we wrestle Scotland back from the grip of a destructive, corrupt and entrenched Labour party who do nothing but take their vote in Scotland for granted?

I would suggest that the Tories need to acknowledge the new constitutional reality in the UK and revise their interpretation of ‘the union’. (One of the features, for me at least, of the recent leaders debates was that the BBC clearly had not. I’m not suggesting the SNP should have got an equal footing, the constitutional anomalies would have been as good as impossible to address, but there was little recognition of this when the debates were being agreed between the broadcasters (I could be wrong here)).

So, basically, I think the Scottish Tories should publically acknowledge what many of them do in private. The Scots should be granted full political and fiscal autonomy. This is completely consistent with conservatism (de-centralisation / individual responsibility / etc) and would create competition between the two countries (which, again, a key feature of conservatism). This would probably need a complete separation between the Scots Tories and the Westminster based party to assure the Scots that connections to the ‘nasty party’ have been severed but an ideological partnership could be retained.

We could then redefine the union as a cultural and social one. Free labour movement, both countries could leave the EU (they would have to – and I’d argue for Scotland to stay out and join EFTA), etc, etc…

As you rightly claim, an effective right of centre party is completely absent from Scotland. This is not only damaging (in terms of political arguments in Scotland being almost arbitrary) but it is inconsistent with the political make up of the Scots psyche.

Sure, there’d be problems and tension but to pretend that the current arrangement is doing anything other than sour the relations between the two countries is deluded.

Unionism is British nationalism. We should all have the courage to be nationalistic about our individual countries, rather than some strange ‘union’ that exists between them. Nationalism is a good thing as long as it does not lead one to think their nation is superior to other nations.

Consistent with this, I believe, my nationalism is all about individual responsibility and recognising Scotland’s failings as much as it is about promoting its strength. When I argue for an independent Scotland I do very much from a pro-England, and pro-English, perspective. Two great countries which are locked in a tense and unconstructive relationship.

When Hamilton and Button came first and second driving for McLaren in a recent Grand Prix it was billed as a British victory. Nonsense, it was an English one, and I was delighted for them. If I was English I would have wanted this to have been described as an English victory. I certainly didn’t feel the Scots should have been recognised, even implicitly.

TB's unionist credentials have softened since he moved to London. Regarding the ideas pitched here? Full fiscal yes but keeping the head of state, defence and FCO control and he might just be on to something... 

Best Campaign Ad Ever

Via

KRO

:



He'd get TB's vote.

A Tale of Two Launches

When David Miliband declared his candidacy for leader last week, his straight out of the block approach lead to a rushed launch with a group of exhausted, miserable, barely know Labour MPs. All as old or older than him. Having just fought and lost the election campaign, David Miliband looked like one of the guilty men, awkwardly trying to congratulate Cameron before being able to turn the conversation to his announcement.

Compare and contrast his younger, less dorky brother Ed's launch at the eugenics loving Fabian Society's conference this morning. Note-less and comfortable in front of a audience, his bid was greeted with sustained applause. Has someone being having a little media training?

It was hardly a tough crowd for Miliband the Younger to launch his pitch to the semi-respectful, squeezable, soft left block of his party. It was more David Cameron to David Miliband's Davis. There he was jacket off, "descamisado" style, setting up his stall to the metropolitan Labour chatterers, reminding them the need to break out and fight in the rest of the country.

Just the two images show who has the better team in place, the better campaign up and running. David might have the support of a fair chunk of Labour's heavily deflated parliamentary party on side, but lest we forget the members and the unions have just as much say in this fight. Through AV David must win outright in the first round to avoid floods of second preferences for Ed pipping him to the post.And just because an MP has publicly declared doesn't mean they won't change their mind. This is going to be a very long summer for Labour.

 It's important to remember these brothers haven't been exactly been allies for years. David was tightly embeded with the Blairites and Ed very much Brown's man through the last thirteen years of infighting and potshots. There will be no love lost here - when David Miliband was out there making noises before chickening out, his little brother was on TV defending Gordon against him.

No wonder Ed was so willing to drive a wedge through his entire family, to rebel against the natural order that was previously carefully adhered to. He's on to a winner here.. It can only be a matter of time before this is turned into a TV drama.

Prescott's Burnham Booboo

Wonder which candidate Prescott has in mind the help?

Though would any candidate want the full weight of GO4TH - the unsuccessful Prescott fronted operation to lead Labour into fourth place, backing them?

The Future of Blogging

A you may have noticed TB finds himself

tweeting

more and more as his day job takes over too much of his writing time. As the dust settles and routine gets back to normal, he will try get at least a few posts a day up. He will try get his full analysis of the last couple of months up this weekend. As if by coincidence TB's views on that power of blogging under the coalition, or lack of it, have been profiled by the BBC:

"What did surprise me is how quickly the prominent bloggers fell behind the Lib-Con coalition idea, you wouldn't expect that to happen so quickly, even though it is what was needed. We wouldn't want any unnecessary internal argument, it took us 15 years to regroup and be together.

I think after this election you will see how they will all push their own agendas about policies. Blogs have more power now, and any MP would be foolish not to take them seriously. They can bring you down."

You can read the whole article

here

.

Still Waiting...

So he finally made it. Waited a long time to see this:

Still waiting for the call from Dave to ask TB to be his Twitter Tsar...